It's Easy to Fall Into The Drama Ditch I think the bottom line most critical skill for us as leaders of our lives and models for our children is to keep our ground no matter what is going on around us or within us. Think back to the last time a frustrating or scary situation happened to you. Did you get completely knocked off your perch by some piece of drama that touched your life? Or maybe the life of a child or parent or spouse or friend? The truth is that we will always have some type of drama or upsetting situation touching our business or our personal lives. It is not the situation, it is how we react to the situation that frames how … [Read more...]
How To Become A Leader For Yourself and Others
Do you think about how to become a leader? Have you heard that saying, "How we do anything is how we do everything?" For years I didn't understand it - until I started working with clients who wanted to perform better in their career or improve their parenting skills. I quickly noticed that often what we say we believe in (our values) don't match up with our behaviors. Here are a few examples. Statement: I know time is important and I value everyone's time. Behavior: Constantly being 5 to 15 minutes late meeting friends, family members, or children. Statement: I really want to move up in my career. Behavior: Taking sick leave to … [Read more...]
Do Rules Work?
One of my own mentors, Paul Evans, sent a quote to me the other day that's good to think about. "When values conflict with behaviors and behaviors conflict with values we make rules." I've been concerned for a decade now about the increasing jungle of rules and prohibitions placed upon us - adults and children. I can't tell the difference anymore between a picture of a prison and a picture of a public school. Both are often encircled by fencing and barbed wire. I can't think that this is good for the spirits of our children. Fear doesn't facilitate learning. There's a quote from the Tao te Ching that goes like this, "The more prohibitions … [Read more...]
How To Model Leadership To Everyone You Meet
To model leadership, become an encourager. Encourage men, women, and children to take one step toward the secret dream they have. Encourage even one person forward so that she (or he) doesn't give up and accept what is hurting or stifling them. Encourage those you meet and those you love to strengthen their hearts, open their souls, and build for themselves a solid ground of being. And, of course, to encourage others you must also encourage yourself. One way to practice kindness and encouragement for yourself and others is to repeat a loving kindness meditation. The words are first for yourself. "May I be happy. May I be well. May I be … [Read more...]
Teaching Thankfulness To Ourselves and Our Children
Would you prefer to listen to this article? Use the audio player below. Thanksgiving is a natural time for teaching thankfulness. From an adult's point of view, Thanksgiving and the following holidays often bring a higher degree of work and responsibility than our usual routine. If we are not planning for a houseful of guests on Thanksgiving Day we are preparing to travel, often with children in tow, to meet up with friends and family. There's the usual frenzy of shopping for the big feast, getting the house in order, perhaps decorating, and cooking. If we're not doing that the frenzy is getting clothing in … [Read more...]